It finally hit me…

Let’s keep this one short.

I was probably too busy at work. I was probably too busy earning a living. I was probably too busy being a parent (and that goes double because I’m only one parent to two children). I was probably too busy being a son to my parents. All at the same time.

My “busy” concerns probably kept me from feeling bad or depressed about what happened to me and my marriage. It probably kept me from feeling bad about what “that girl” did to my life (and that of my children).

I could easily tell my life story to anyone willing to listen with a cavalier attitude. Before, I would never tire of telling my story so they could learn something from it.

Until now…

Finally, it just hit me. Now, I’m going through the routine questions like, “Why did this happen to me?” “What did I do to deserve this?” or “Why God why?”

It’s the mother of all delayed reactions… Imagine, two years?

Anyway, I hope I pull through. I’ll try to keep you posted on this, if I can.

What a way to start the year…

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6 Comments

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6 responses to “It finally hit me…

  1. How was your new year? Back to reality again *wink.

    “Storytelling is healing. As we reveal ourselves in story, we become aware of the continuing core of our lives under the fragmented surface of our experience. We become aware of the multifaceted, multichaptered ‘ I ‘ who is the storyteller. We can trace out the paradoxical and even contradictory versions of ourselves that we create for different occasions, different audiences…. Most important, as we become aware of ourselves as storytellers, we realized that what we understand and imagine about ourselves is a story. And when we know all this, we can use our stories to heal and make ourselves whole.” ~Susan Wittig Albert~

  2. Hey Punzi,
    Hang in there bud! The kids are with you and I’m pretty sure they love being with you. The Lord has something planned for you, nothing happens without a reason, though it sometimes feels really unfair.
    Isang case ng Cerveza Negra lang yan then you move on hehe.

    Happy new year!!

  3. Awww…cheer up, Punzi. Don’t beat yourself up over it. Existentialism can push you over the edge. Something Ph 101 and 102 forgot to tell us. Go and rant…you’ve got your loyal followers to listen/read every detail. šŸ™‚

  4. I read you occassionally and couldn’t let this pass this time. Am putting in my two cents for whatever it’s worth.

    If you care to, check out http://alymama.blogspot.com/2005/10/dont-get-stuck.html

  5. happy new year, panyero(from frustrated lawyer)

    you have the best thing in your life still, your two great kids,

    wishing all the best in the new year

  6. but we have still a magical element that have we no control of, that we confront, at least plan,and hope and pray for the best, remember during at night God is still with us, that is why we stars at night just to guide us,

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